When was the last time you had a conversation that you dreaded? In fact you put it off for as long as possible, all the while it was taking over your thoughts?

A friend of mine recently asked me how she could talk to her parents before they started aging about finances…How could she bring it up and not hurt their feelings? What do you say? Where do you start?

I’m not sure why it is that I can talk to most anyone, yet when it comes to a conversation with someone that I love and respect, it throws a whole new emotion in the mix.

FEAR.

We all see it, every single day.

As we talk to people in line at the grocery store, it looks like they are about to fall over from exhaustion, only to find out that they are 63 years old themselves, and they are currently taking care of their 90 year old mother who has dementia.

Think about that. How hard would that be? I think it would be harder to take care of an aging parent much more so than the conversation that needs to happen beforehand.

As we talk to people in line at the grocery store, it looks like they are about to fall over from exhaustion, only to find out that they are 63 years old themselves, and they are currently taking care of their 90 year old mother who has dementia.

The hardest conversations to have are normally the ones that make the most difference.

We can’t determine someone’s reaction, but when we speak honestly it raises the relationship to a completely different level. Speaking from your heart and not from a selfish place normally will get your point across.

I spend a lot of time with people before they receive a dreadful diagnosis. They tend to want their finances in order before the “what if that happens”, HAPPENS.

I thought about my friend’s question. I told her that I have had a difficult time expressing what I do for a living to my parents. I can talk to most anyone, yet the ones that I love & I want the best for are the most difficult for me to approach.

Ultimately it is our job to take care of those we love.

Here are some of the points that made my conversation a bit easier:

Not having this talk creates a sense of guilt & helplessness for the entire family in the event the conversation took place too late or never at all.

To answer the question…take care of those that have taken care of you. Don’t assume it’s already been taken care of. Have that conversation!!!